Who Reads Yesterday's Papers
-Conservatives throughout the country are frothingly furious about a ruling by San Francisco’s very own 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeal for saying that parents don't have the right to be the sole provider of information about sex. That's what MTV is for. The suit was brought by parents who were outraged that a school in Palmdale California gave first, third, and fifth graders a survey about sex. The questions asked kids whether they found themselves doing things like touching their "private parts" too much or whether they didn't trust people because they thought they were looking for sex or whether they thought too much about sex and dear God, is that what first-graders are really thinking about these days? When were that young, the only thing we were obsessed with was "The Six Million Dollar Man."
In response, Republicans have been talking about splitting up the 9th District Circuit which, of course, is being fought by Democrats. The 9th Circuit has always been a source of anger to conservatives for the kind of rulings that make people say "only in California." Like this ruling. Or the one about taking "God" out of the Pledge of Allegiance.
-After delaying a vote on the Home Depot issue for one week, decision time came once again to the Board of Supes. So they decided to postpone the decision for one more week. The reason being they say they need more time to study. The decision to delay the vote was fought by Tom Ammiano who is afraid that the delay will give Home Depot more time to do some dealing. He is also trying to get the environmental impact report sent back to the Planning Commission because he doesn’t agree with their report. Hmm? Politicians sending back factual reports because it doesn’t agree with what they believe. Where have we heard that before? Anyways, all we can say is that if they do open up a Home Depot, please make sure you check the toilets before sitting on one. You never know if it's going to be smeared with glue.
-Those cheerleaders who got arrested for having sex with each other in a bathroom stall? Career crippling development or brilliant career move? We all know where this is heading: magazine spreads, VH-1 reality TV guest spots, and things being "leaked" to the Internet.
-The other day we got a letter in the mail from our Supervisor, Chris Daly. We eagerly opened the letter to see what Chris had sent us, thinking that it had to be important because it was his official letter-head and official envelope. It wasn't. The letter was basically him just crowing about getting the deal done and letting everyone know what a great Supervisor he is. Thanks for sharing.
-After years of acrimony, the Raid-duhs and the county of Alameda finally have an agreement to end the scourge known as PSLs, or Personal Seat Licenses. The PSLs were part of the agreement that helped bring the Rai-duhs back to Oakland and have been an unmitigated disaster. Most people believe that the PSLs are responsible for the Rai-duhs inability to sell-out games, increased debts for the county and city of Oakland, the destruction of a once nice baseball stadium, and the inability to stop Larry Johnson from a one-yard dive with no time remaining. While the agreement worked out between Al Davis and the county doesn't guarantee everything coming up roses in the future, it'll give the Rai-duhs control of their marketing and could stop the bleeding in terms of debts the county takes on as a result of the agreement. Either way, it'll mean less money the county has to pay out just in legal fees. Please note, however, that the new agreement gives the Rai-duhs an out in five years when the current lease is up. Which means five more years of “Al Wants to move back to L.A.” stories.
Ah, Raiders fans, don't you love your team?