Interview: Paula Kamen
Paula Kamen has a headache.
We can say that with some assurance because she's had a headache for over a decade now. For most of us, the idea of suffering from a headache for more time than it takes for a couple of Advil to kick in sounds unbelievable, but after reading All in My Head, Kamen's book about her battle with chronic daily headache, (and dealing with some daily headache issues of our own), we've come to understand that chronic pain is an all too real condition for millions of people.
A book about a battle with a constant headache? Doesn't sound too cheery a read, does it? But Kamen does the seemingly impossible and has written a book that is incredibly engrossing, meticulously researched, and downright hilarious. It's one of the best books we've read this year.
She'll be in town Tuesday the 2nd for a reading and signing at A Clean Well-Lighted Place for Books at 7 p.m., and at the Book Passage in Corte Madera Thursday the 4th, also at 7 p.m.
First question is, of course, "How's your head today?"
Not too bad. About a 3 (out of 10). Before I got chronic daily headache, I would have been in bed with pain like this. But I've gotten used to it to some extent, at least when it's at a lower level. I never will get used to the level 5 and up. Normally it's about at a 4-6, with some 7-8s sprinkled in between. Is that too much information?
How's the book tour going?
Very well. I am now in Seattle and took a fascinating tour of the new Rem Koolhaus-designed green-friendly public library here, which is a masterpiece. I love how I now have excuses to visit cool places like this, now that I'm traveling.
Have you discovered anything new about chronic daily headaches since the book's publication, such as new research or treatments?
I've learned that it's more common than I even thought. At every reading I meet others who are suffering silently from chronic daily headache (headache every day), and often having gone through very similar absurd adventures trying to get a "cure." I'm hoping that more people will speak out about it and it will be more validated. A woman I just met -- who is on public aid because of her constant headaches -- told me that when she went to the doctor years ago, they'd tell her that what she had was "impossible." They don't tell her that now.
I've also learned even more to never put down any one mode of headache relief (unless it's a fraud, which I admit is not easy to define). I've been getting emails from people who were really helped by some of the things that didn't help me and I wrote about humorously, like homeopathy, food allergy stuff, and body work.
My motto: whatever works. No questions asked.
But it's still notable how many people like me have NOT found significant longterm relief through alternative medicine and drugs. That "longterm relief" part is key; almost anyone can help pain in the short term. Just distract yourself or take heavy narcotics.
I was so thankful to find your book when my headaches started. It was like the EXACT book I needed at exactly the right time. Have other people with similar symptoms been discovering the book and getting in contact with you?
Yes, besides the folks I meet at readings, I've been getting about an email a day from other chronic pain sufferers, mostly women in their 20s and 30s. They also suffer from a lot of invisible (and what one just called "periodic" pain and/or fatigue-involving disabilities, such as endometriosis, chronic fatigue syndrome, irritable bowel syndrome, fibromyalgia, etc. I'm sorry they're going through this torment, but am glad to see folks connecting the dots about how so many of these pain syndromes are related -- and how those with them deserve to take life at a different pace. These problems are often rooted in similar overactive neurology in the brain, and mainly affect women. This consciousness raising is the first step to trying to get some validation and medical research.
If a reader suffering from chronic pain can take one thing away from reading your book, what would you want that to be? How about for a reader without chronic pain?
For those with pain: It's real. For better and for worse, pain is a neurological disease. And, I recommend acceptance as a management tool. It doesn't mean "giving up" -- I'm still looking for relief although I accept my pain -- but it does mean recognizing it so you can live around it.
For those without pain: It's real. For better and for worse, pain is a neurological disease. And, don't rag on us when we want to sleep late; a lot of us feel way worse in the morning.
Name
Paula Kamen
Introduce yourself in one sentence
Textbook Aries.
Age and Occupation
38, author and playwright
Home Town
Chicago
How much time have you spent in the Bay Area? Where abouts and doing what?
I went to San Francisco with my family as a child, when my dad had a psychology conference there. We stayed in a sort of seedy motel in the Red Light district, that my dad's bachelor friend had recommended. My sister, brother and I were scared of this strange non-suburban atmosphere and convinced my dad to go to a more expensive Holiday Inn.
I made a few trips in the early '90s doing interviews for my last book, Her Way, on young women's sexual attitudes. I interviewed a lot of activists, even some in the Red Light District, working at the Lusty Lady. And those at Good Vibrations, the editor of FutureSex, the Safe Sex Sluts, etc. San Francisco was much more culturally advanced with feminist sex issues then, so it was mind blowing.
Favorite website
chronicbabe.com, a new site for the "young, hip and chronic,"; demystifying illness as a part of life. Not sad -- no glass menageries there. I recommend you buy the cool tote bag they are selling as a fundraiser, by Chicago artist Cinnamon Cooper.
What I'm currently reading
The Journalist and the Murderer, about how amoral journalism can be. It came out about 15 years ago, an expansion of Janet Malcolm's New Yorker essays.
SF has the BEST
Pomosexual feminist activists
You can tell someone is a local here IF:
Has a type of sexual orientation or identity I haven't heard of yet....
Favorite artist to come out of the Bay Area:
Bitch Magazine (even though that's really a magazine, not an artist)
Favorite author to come out of the Bay Area:
Norman Solomon, media critic (I did research for his book Unreliable Sources, after graduating from college). A very hard worker, and very passionate about his work. Has a new book on media coverage of the Iraq war.
I have found/sold/bought the following on Craigslist:
Found freelance typists for my transcription service, transprof.com, which helps support my writing. I also found a guy to install a new dishwasher hose cheaply and effectively.
I want all the SFists out there to know:
I will be giving away free narcotics at my readings.
Questions you'd ask if you were doing this interview:
What types of drugs do you take?
(Answer: none. I'd rather be lucid and be in pain. But I do take up to 2 Tylenol Sinuses and up to 2 Ultrams a week. Any more, and they lose effectiveness for me.)
How do you manage your pain?
My number-one tool is pace. I accept that I do less, but it all does add up by the end of the week. I have a certain number of daily marbles (energy units), and that's it. So if an activity takes up a lot of marbles, such as a reading, that's about all I'll do that day. It sucks, but now I'm used to it and am much more reliable. I also appreciate the relative lack of chaos in my life, a result of just doing less. Those of us with careers that are more flexible, where we can control the pace, are often the most able to cope with chronic pain.