We Read The Weeklies
Last week's winner, the "locally owned and operated since 1966" Bay Guardian. The Guardian buys out a full-page ad in its own newspaper about the SF Weekly! We love the CLEAR CHANNEL = BUSH, CLEAR CHANNEL = SF WEEKLY thing. The transitive property rules. Everyone's favorite topic, community-choice aggregation of public power. Cover article: A dude who pretended to be a bank. More toilet humor by Dan Leone, and veggie banh mi. SF Jewish Film Fest and Gus Van Sant.
Next up, the SF Weekly -- oh, sorry, we meant to say: the "Clear Channel Spawn of Satan not-authentically-SF" Weekly, our bad. Dog Bites makes fun of the first version of the previously-mentioned ad Bruce Brugman emailed to them, about the Bay "Guard-AIN." Also, a frighteningly-well-designed response (.pdf). Duelling cover articles: fake social security cards and local band the Herms. Also, their club columnist gets into Otis, using nothing more than SF Weekly (sorry, we meant to say "running-dog imperialistic not-authentically-SF Weekly") business cards. We totally need to print out our SFist business cards.
The evil scum-sucking not-authentically-SF New Times affiliate East Bay Express and the much-missed voice of reason through all of this alterna-media on alterna-media violence, the SJ Metro, after the jump. Plus, the pick of the week!
The EBX: The Fun issue! Examples of fun: people who work too hard, people who don't enjoy things, and bloggers. Also, a guy who rents out those enclosed trampoline jumpers with the balls in 'em for the kids. Those are totally fun. The food critic pretends it's his birthday at four chain restaurants (one is the Olive Garden). Happy, happy, happy, happy, birthday birthday birthday birthday!! And Savage Love: twins.
And the Metro. Keep your noses clean down in the South Bay, guys! The San Jose counterculture. Overcrowding in the Santa Clara jail. Cover article: author goes with a guy named Jackson to find weed in Mexico. Dumplings! And the Straight Dope: could the spoiler in War of the Worlds actually happen? (nah.)
Pick of the week: Do you guys read US Weekly? They've started this new feature where they review various feuds from that week, and, for some reason, Hulk Hogan picks the winner. He's always wrong, and always says something mysterious like, "Hilary Duff! Because she's a lady through and through." Well, we're going to go all Hogan on you here and call it: "The SF Weekly! Any place that has a concert hall named after it can't be wrong!"