Ho U

So you want to be a hooker? Want a new profession doing the world's oldest profession? Want to learn some new tips for turning tricks? Well SFist has just the thing for you! On May 4th, you too can attend Whore College. Yep, for the cheap price of $20 per class, $40 for a day pass, you can take a whole bunch of classes that teach you how to be a ho. Afterwards, you can even earn a diploma, and nothing impresses a John more than a whore with a diploma (not that SFist would ever know, of course). Sadly, they won't be offering our favorite classes this year such as "Deconstructing Guido the Killer Pimp," "Crack Whores Through History" and "How to Get a White House Press Pass," but we're sure if there's enough demand, they can add it. Best part of all this? You can get a scholarship!

The classes are part of the 4th Annual Sex Worker Film & Arts Fest, Sex Worker, of course, being the nice, politically correct term for a hooker (SFist, being the essence of politically correct, often refers to the toothless crone who always propositions us on the way to work as a "Crack Sex Worker.") Among other things, the 4th Annual Sex Worker Film & Arts Fest, or BAYSWAN for short, features films, a sex toy bazaar, an art exhibit, a performance by Annie Sprinkle, and burlesque shows. All of which raises this question: if conventions are notorious for being great opportunities for hookers to turn tricks, who is around to turn tricks at a hooker convention?