If you're wondering why hell is getting colder or why dogs and cats are living together, it's because the unlikeliest of forces have joined together to battle the evils of file-sharing. Just in time for a big March 29th date with the Supreme Court, the legal team of the Christian Coalition have joined forces with the legal team of Hollywood to make the case against online file sharing programs like Grokster. Yes, that's right, the Christian Coalition have joined forces with those elitist, filth-peddling, gay Jews in Hollywood to stop little Timmy and little Susie from downloading that annoyingly catchy Kelly Clarkson tune. Politics may make strange bedfellows, but this one is an elephant/pig type bedfellow. The partnering of these two groups is like when when Blade joins together with a bunch of vampires to defeat an evil mutant vampire in Blade II.

Now you may be wondering why the Christian Coalition is taking such an interest in people downloading illegal Beck mash-ups or musical Buffy goodness, but the reason is fairly obvious in that one of the major things being shared over these programs is porn. That, of course, is bad. Kill the program and the porn will die. Or at least gets posted on urls where it's totally easy to download them. It's a good thing too that they're stepping up the battle because now that hacking into celebrity computers and posting their sex tapes is all the rage, somebody has to save us before a Tara Reid video gets out there.

The case, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Studios Inc. v. Grokster, Ltd, pits mainly the entertainment industry against tech companies, consumer electronic companies, and librarians. The entertainment industry says file sharing is illegal and prevents artists like Metallica or Don Henley from getting even richer. The defendants in the case argue that it's not the file sharing companies' fault if people use the programs to download things for free. After all, it's not the programs that kill copyright laws, its people that kill copyright laws. Now that the Christian Coalition is joining the fight to stop downloading porn, there is no word as to whether Clarence Thomas will have to recuse himself.

Image of the end result of what happens when a pig makes love to an elephant from South Park